My aunt died before I was born, my uncle died when he was born, my baby cousin died so my aunt could live, my baby cousin Alissa also died. Her mom got a tattoo of the day she was born, I never really knew any of these people. I wish I had. I have lied to my parents so I would not hurt them, I have lied to my cousins to protect them. I have lied to myself to feel better about the mistakes I have made. I have been repeatedly told it's my fault even though it wasn't, the people that I care for the most have hurt me more than I thought they could, someone has told me a secret I wish I did not know, I know more than people think I do.
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I have tried almost all of the main dance styles, including ballroom dancing, ballet, tap, jazz, and hip hop. My favorite animal is a toucan. When I was in fourth grade, I went to my first summer camp, which is where I almost got stranded in the lake. Summer of 2018 I dropped my phone into a lake and 10 minutes later we found it, it is still the phone I use today. Once I saw a beluga whale and thought it was a shark… I cried. I had my first Wendy’s frosty February of this year… strongly recommend. My mom home cooks every meal we eat, mostly. My grandma makes amazing blueberry periogies and our dog is actually from Poland. Our family goes skiing every year in Colorado. My dad was going to be in the 2012 Sochi para-olympics but he broke his wrist, he has actually popped his lung once, broken his collarbone 4 times, and nose 3 times, so that stinks. In second grade I Learned how to finger knit, I also sewed my favorite pillow. In fourth grade my grandma helped me sew a dress that I designed for personalized learning, I still have it. I have the same birthday as two of my cousins, different years.
I lived in South Elgin all my life until the end of 6th grade. I had a going-away party to say bye to all my close friends since kindergarten. We went to the Sugar Factory and had a huge group sleepover at my house. At the Sugar Factory, they all dared me to order a birthday cake even though it wasn’t my birthday and everyone thought we were so rebellious when we did it. Now when I look back at it, that was kind of the lamest dare ever. The cake wasn't even that good. The best cake I’ve ever had was a homemade cheesecake my aunt made. The crust was soft and the edges were perfectly smooth. The strawberries on top were so fresh. Since that day, all I ever have eaten is cheesecake. One day, my dad and I went shopping at the mall for some summer clothes. I begged him to go to the CheeseCake Factory, and sooner then later we were sitting at a booth with more cake slices than we could eat. That day we took home two bags full of cake. At the mall I also got a new phone because I had broken mine (not a surprise). Talking about the mall, when I was in 1st grade, my dad and I went to the mall toy store, we were looking for a birthday present for my younger brother. We got him something I can’t remember but I know it was on the top of his list. Then we got him a really creepy stuffed gorilla as a birthday prank. He was spooked! He cried and cried until one day the gorilla became his ultimate pranking toy.
I once broke my arm when I was in 4th grade. It was not a pleasant time but it got me out of school for a while. I remember going to my grandparents' house for big parties, and my brother, cousins, and I would swim in his pool. But he passed away so now things are different. I remember getting in fights with my friends but getting the problem resolved. Or the time where I had a appendicitis on Mother's Day, my mom stayed at the hospital the whole night. I can't forget the time when I went to Cancun. Or the time when my aunt passed. When I finally got a dog, which was a awesome day. Or when I went to Six Flags the day before my birthday. Ups and downs in my life. But they all led me back to one place, home.
A broken boy so lost and confused
knowing what's right but doing the wrong having people who care to be there to help and fix his wrong doing his only escape to run and don’t stop and having family and friends who care and support. 1. Go with the flow.
Start with an idea, and let it lead you through. Feel comfortable with it before you start, have a rough idea of what you want to create. Then let it all out. 2. Say what you feel. It’s not wrong to feel things, so express it. In whatever way that may be, drawing, painting, writing. It doesn’t matter, it’s a way to let things out and express how you feel, maybe so others can understand it or so you can begin to understand it more too. 3. Know the difference between an amateur and an expert. An expert connects with their audience and themselves, it’s important to know yourself and who you’re sharing with. An amateur may not be able to connect with themselves or an audience, but when you get to the point of knowing how to understand them both, it makes all the difference. 4. Find inspiration. It’s hard to do something without motivation or inspiration. That’s why when I’m inspired, I write. If I see something that inspires me, I tend to mimic that writing style or topic. Then I let it all flow out. If you’re struggling with finding motivation, try to inspire yourself. It works, I promise. 5. Let yourself settle in whatever you’re expressing. Acknowledge what you’re feeling and try to accept those feelings, whether you feeling everything or nothing or anything in between or outside of it. Try to connect with yourself and express what you’re feeling in a way that feels good for you. 6. Accept the things you don’t like about your creation. Things can always be improved, but it doesn’t always necessarily need to be. If you don’t like it, you can start over or try and fix it. I know it’s frustrating when you mess up, or if you work hard on something but it doesn’t come out as expected. It’s alright, take a breath. I know you probably want to ruin or destroy your creation because it’s not what you wanted but you have to learn to accept that we are not perfect. Our imperfections make us who we are. Without them, we wouldn’t be authentic. 7. Accept that fact that you are not perfect. Although you may want to be, no human is or is capable of being perfect. We all have flaws, shortcomings, and imperfections. Most of the time we probably set higher expectations for ourselves than others do for us, and then we’re disappointed in ourselves and may think others are in disappointed in us when we don’t reach those expectations. These expectations are most of the time unrealistic and unachievable, but just because they may be those things does not mean you have failed or are a failure, it just means you have to adjust your expectations. SING. SING. SING!
Sitting in my room. All alone. Headphones on man on my phone. Listenin’ to the beat. I’m lyin’ low. Feelin’ it in my feet. Oh, yo, yo, yo! Mouth opens wide. Ready to sing. Oh, One. Two. One. Two. Three! I’m havin’ a jam. Headphone off. Ya, still singin’ the beat. Singin’ there’s no way to cheat. Peanut butter jelly time! (x2) And now it’s time to take a break. *Beat boxing* Back at it again, playing my songs. Dude, it’s like a vlog but it’s really a song. *Beat boxing* *Ding, ding, ding* Getting a text. “Wassap… Wanna hang?” “Sry, no now” this is gettin’ in my way! Turning off my phone… It’s been awhile… 6 hours long! Wow, that’s the span of like 600 miles, Kyle! Oooooooh! *Mic drop* 10. Get home, go straight to the T.V and watch.
9. Get off of the T.V and go straight to my basketball practice. 8. Now get home from basketball practice and go to the video games. 7. Now get off the video games and make dinner. 6. Now eat my delicious dinner with my whole family. 5. After dinner, go to youtube and watch some of the funniest videos ever! 4. After the funniest videos ever, I ask my mom if I can go on a bike ride and she said yes! 3. After I have the longest bike ride ever, I had to go to my boy scouts meeting. 2. After my boy scouts meeting I had to go to a play that I was in. 1. After my long day I had I finally had to get some sleep. 10. Step up to the block.
9. Have a good team, fast people. 8. Go last be a anchor. 7. Wait for teammates to finish. 6. Dive in with a streamline. 5. Three dolphin kicks are key. 4. Start your kicking. 3. Pull like mad and don't stop. 2. Always do your flip turns. 1. Win it all with your team. |
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May 2022
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